Thursday, March 2, 2006

My birthday is in nineteen days and the emotional meltdown is beginning already

Stuck in a meeting in a freezing cold room, so what am I doing? Blogging. Oh well. To each his own.

Somewhere in the mail there is a copy of "The Student Prince," which I returned to Netflix last week, but it hasn't gotten there yet. It's been a week, so I filed a missing disc report. I was afraid to do that because I am terrified that Netflix is going to think that I stole the movie. Which I didn't. Cause it was terrible. (Really, even with St. Roop and Robson.) I would have waited another day before reporting it, but I want Curse of the Were-Rabbit to be sent to me before the weekend. I just hope it turns up eventually, because I mailed that dvd in good faith, and now I feel a little bit guilty about it, like I failed Netflix in someway, even though I know that those feelings are utterly unfounded and ridiculous, especially since I read that Netflix deliberately stalls the orders of people who rent a high volume of films per month. On average, I rent about 9-10 dvds depending on the month; they're counting on people to rent about 5. I guess that makes me a "high volume" person, and I throw off the curve.
ETA: "just" received e-mail that Netflix JUST received this movie...HIGHLY SUSPECT!!

My ten year college reunion is coming up in June, and a woman in my class (with whom I became really friendly our senior year) and I have been e-mailing back and forth a bit about our misgivings regarding attending the events. Reading her e-mails are hysterical: she basically has all of the same concerns that I have, with all of the same corollating subtext. We aren't married (subtext: UNLOVED AND UNWANTED), no kids (subtext: BARREN AND UNFULFILLED), both are involved in academic administration (subtext: MAKE LESS MONEY THAN ALL OF THOSE LAWYERS IN OUR CLASS), and both of us feel we could really do with loosing about 15 pounds (subtext: PROBABLY COULD BENEFIT FROM LYPOSUCTION AND A MAKEOVER AT GUCCI.) The whole thing would be really funny if it weren't happening to us. We are both strong, smart, creative women, and yet, here we are, reduced in our own eyes to these Bridget Jones-like individuals, only without the Silk Cuts, the pervy boss and the mothers with the pickled gherkins.

The one positive thing that we both have in common is that we love to travel, and I have been thinking that is the way that I am going to show up at this reunion with my head held high.
Hypothetical conversation with Smug Married Classmate #1:
"Oh, look at your little toddlers... how sweeet! ::gag:: Now dahling, let me tell you about how I jetted away to Europe for the weekend two weeks ago, sweetie dahling." (subtext: I AM STILL FREE AND YOU ARE OLD AND BORING!!)

I am probably giving this way too much thought and emotionally overacting. It will probably be fine, and everyone will be very nice. It's just that there are all of the expectations of milestones that I feel that I should have reached that I haven't. The only one I am really disappointing is myself; I think that is the part that hurts the most because I SHOULDN'T be disappointed in the first place! Overall, I am happy; shouldn't that be enough?


  1. i left my movie on the plane last week, so i've reported it as "lost in the mail" -- i'm hoping that some nice flight attendant has dropped it in the mail . . .

  2. hey lil' miss diet coke addict! hope you are well! i just realized that i will be missing my 5 year college reunion. i'll be in the mother(FATHER)land..india.. at that point. wonder what the subtext would be in that situation. (I'M SO COOL THAT I CAN'T EVEN MAKE THE REUNION BECAUSE I AM JET SETTING MY ASS AROUND THE WORLD or I AM JUST A TOTAL PLONKER WHO CAN'T HANDLE CONSENUS REALITY AND AM TRAVELLING BECAUSE I CAN'T HACK IT!) Love you and miss you! EMAIL ME!!!



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